Have you ever looked in the mirror and hated the woman or man that stares back at you? Have you ever looked around and felt that other people are better looking than you? Have you ever felt that your weakness lies in your inability to acknowledge the beauty within? Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. The feeling of hating what looks back at you in the mirror is incredibly familiar for me and I thought the best way to help others is to share my experience. This was initially meant to be a poem but I just couldn’t seem to fit the words into stanzas and metaphors which gracefully paint the vision behind it.
I went through a period where crying seemed the only possible solution to the disgust I felt toward myself. Speaking to people never seemed enough because I already knew what the people were bound to say. They were going to reassure me that I was not as terrible as I thought I was. They would try to convince me that I was in fact so much more beautiful than I knew. Whatever. It was weird because there was nothing anybody could say or do; I was set in my ways. Tears were my only consolation.
During this period I felt so alone and miserable, I would have moody outbursts and just shut myself away from the world. I had hit my rock bottom and if I’m sincerely honest I’m only moving out of this period now. Isaiah 45:9 (NLT) reads “What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator.” When I read this I realised that the only possible answer to my problem was myself. I had to come the realisation that I had brought misery upon myself by challenging the work of my Creator. As some would know the Bible says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, it also states that we are made in the image of God, but for me knowing these scriptures of by heart was not enough. Isaiah 45:9 was enough. It was the missing link. For the longest time I had found myself wondering why God made me the way He did. Why did I have to be so tall? Why didn’t I have a smile like hers? Why did I lack those mesmerizing eyes that other girls had? Isaiah taught me that sorrow lies in wait for someone with questions as such. Not only did I undermine the power of God but I demeaned Him as the most creative Creator ever.
Dreaming and wishing that you look like someone else is an insult to God. I had to try and see things from His perspective. If I had spent time creating a poem and then the poem was to turn around and say that its stands for nothing, its rubbish, it would hurt. Immediately I had to correct myself and realise that God had spent time on me to make me as I am. He created me with all my flaws but He considers me beautiful regardless of what the world may think therefore its only right to see myself in the same light. Each person comes with their own deficiencies and incapacities but all in all each of us stand as individual masterpieces. We all illustrate the mind of God and we all show the creativity of God.
So ladies and gentlemen, what am I getting at? In short you are beautiful! The joy that comes from accepting and believing this is far better than the sorrow that follows from believing that you are less than you are. Begin to believe it. Begin to profess it. I AM BEAUTIFUL!!!
Hugs and kisses...