Over the past two weeks I have had ample time to sit down and assess the past five months of my life. The past five months that I believed was idle. The past five months which grew more and more annoying with each day that passed. The past five months that I failed to acknowledge that God was trying to show me something. Something that would’ve been made clear in the space of a few days took me five months and two weeks. However, to God be the glory, I can share what I have learnt.
In the first week of my two week period, I went through a phrase of accepting that I was beautiful and appreciating God’s evident work in me. This was the physical stage, the time where I was forced to understand what it means to adore the woman staring back at me in the mirror. The first week inspired my ‘I Am Beautiful’ piece. This second week which is coming to an end has made me focus on the inner beauty.
One thing I had to painfully realise was that in looking beautiful, if I did not have the ‘beautiful’ character to match it was all pointless. For example, wearing the best attire but having a filthy attitude. I had to sit and think what image I preferred to have. It was between being hollow, having all the physical attributes but empty inside or being filled, a lovely character radiating on the physical me. Please don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with looking nice, there is nothing wrong with making an effort but the problem comes in when your main focus becomes looking nice rather than being a better person.
I had to learn that what was most important was your heart. The following scriptures spoke volumes to me:
“What matters is not your outer appearance – the styling of your hair, the jewellery you wear, the cut of your clothes – but your inner disposition.” (1 Peter 3:3 MSG)
For the longest period of my life I put so much emphasis on how I looked on the outside and failed to even care about my inner disposition. I didn’t care about whether what I may have said may have had an adverse effect on someone but I cared about the next set of shoes or the type of mascara I would wear. I worried more about the outside forgetting that beauty comes from within. It was and is a process which takes time but the first step was to have the will to go through it.
“Your beauty should come from within you – the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit that will never be destroyed and is special to God.” (1 Peter 3:4 NCV)
Once we allow God to perfect the beauty within us nothing can ever come our way and stop us from saying I AM BEAUTIFUL!